Dear Ben...

Today is your birthday and you turn 14.  Fourteen years ago, I was wading through some trials life threw my way.  I had just placed your sister in a pediatric nursing home three hours away from me because we could no longer afford a nurse to help with her 24-hour care needs and our grant had come to an end.  I spent every weekend driving to sit and rock her and every other night crying myself to sleep wondering if she would live to see me again.

So on the day you arrived into my life, I can remember for the first time in many, many months being so completely filled with joy.  True JOY!  Thinking about it today I remember it clearly and as I stared at your sweet new face, I felt hopeful about the future.  I felt that while I had your sweet little innocent life to tend to, I could be hopeful once again.

Over the years, you have brought me laughter, hugs, tests, tears, tenderness, madness, frustration, and JOY!!

I love how kind you are.  How you think of others feelings and choose your friends wisely.  I love your need for speed ~ athletically speaking.  You are so darn fast and busy!

I love how you are sensitive, even though you HATE it when I say that ~ but it is a good thing because it makes you the caring and compassionate person I love.

I love your wild and crazy sense of humor and making me laugh more at myself!



I love how, even though you are 14, you still like hanging out with me (as long as your buddies aren't around). And how you beat the pants off your dad on the driveway basketball court!

I love your thirst for learning and your ability to remember anything you read.  I love that you love history and teach me things I never knew or forgot with the cobwebs of life.

I love that you care about the things that really matter (like making your dad breakfast on father's day) and even though I wish you were more organized (or organized at all) I know you'll find a way to pull it off and survive!

All in all I just want to say you ROCK.  And I love you more than you will ever know.


So happy everything today and always my sweet Boo Boo!